


The Purity of Love

by Sarek and Amanda Archive Maintainer (Selek)



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Bert - Freeform, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-25
Updated: 2013-03-25
Packaged: 2017-12-06 10:06:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/734449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Selek/pseuds/Sarek%20and%20Amanda%20Archive%20Maintainer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sarek and Amanda meet one another in route to Vulcan, where Sarek is returning from his first Ambassadorial tour of Earth and Amanda is to teach Vulcans Federation Standard at the Vulcan Science Academy.</p><p>Written by Bert (T'Ryl).</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Purity of Love

Title: The Purity of Love

Author: Bert

Beta Editor: Selek (once again thanks for the wonderful help.)

Rating: NC-17 due to a sexual encounter…a first sexual encounter.

Summary: Sarek and Amanda meet one another in route to Vulcan, where Sarek is returning from his first Ambassadorial tour of Earth and Amanda is to teach Vulcans Federation Standard at the Vulcan Science Academy.

 

Disclaimer: If God intended me to own Star Trek I would be rich. Instead he gives me the ideas to play with Paramount’s toys…that I do so with no gain…except for the satisfaction of helping characters live and breathe in my own eyes.

 

Chapter 1

 

Sarek sat in the observation deck of the starship Challenger. He watched out the window as the stars danced by. Soon he would stand once more on the sands of his homeworld. His time away from Vulcan had proven quite uneventful and he looked forward to returning to Vulcan. It was not logical but he was very homesick.

 

As he gazed out the window he smelled the aroma of a sweet fragrance. When he turned, he was faced with a human female. Deep blue eyes the color of Earth's oceans, light brown hair that shimmered with gold highlights. She looked at him, or rather through him. "Excuse me sir, may I have the book seated on the table behind you?" Her voice was soft as she spoke. She was petite by Vulcan standards, making her look fragile.

 

Sarek reached for the book slightly behind him. Before handing it to her, he read the cover, 'Vulcan History: Facts and Fiction'. Lifting an eyebrow he told her, "This book is not exactly the truth about Vulcan history." He handed it to her, letting his hand brush against hers a moment; her control was quite well for a human.

 

Her smile was intoxicating. "I know, but I have to read as many things as I can before we get to Vulcan. This had enough facts in it to be useful." She sat in a vacant chair next to Sarek. She had little occasion to speak with a real Vulcan so she hoped he wouldn't mind her company.

 

Sarek watched as she sat down, her grace reminded him of the swans he watched at the Vulcan Embassy on Earth. The statement she made played with his curiosity. "If I may ask, why would you need to learn of Vulcan from books?"

 

Her smile deepened at his question. "I don't know many Vulcans and I will be spending the next year at the Vulcan Science Academy." His gaze alone was enough to bring the blood to her face. He was so handsome for a Vulcan; she knew she could sit with him for hours and just watch him.

 

Sarek once again allowed his eyebrow to rise into his hairline. "That is not an easy task for a non-Vulcan." He knew she had to be someone in the top of her field…what ever her field was. Not only was she very pleasing in appearance, she had intelligence as well.

 

"I know, I spent three years on a waiting list," she said It was hard to gain entrance to the Academy.

 

Sarek studied this human female. She seemed to smile often. "I, too, will be returning to the Academy. My tour of duty on Earth is finished for the moment." He had been accustomed to humans smiling but none had ever captured him the way she had. Were he not Vulcan he would be tempted to return her smile.

 

Her eyes lit up as she heard him say that he had worked on Earth. "Oh, where did you work? The embassy?" Most Vulcans she heard of on Earth worked at the Embassy in San Francisco.

 

He naturally assumed the entire ship knew he was Ambassador Sarek of Vulcan. It was obvious she did not. "Yes, I spent three years there…offering my services."

 

Before either of them could say anything else, the first officer came into the room. "Sir, we will be orbiting Vulcan within the hour." The Lieutenant Commander smiled at the human female with Sarek.

 

Sarek looked at the officer. "I will be prepared." He turned to the human female he had been speaking with. "I must take my leave of you."

She nodded at the Vulcan male she had been conversing with. "Perhaps we will see each other again." She doubted it but the Academy was not that large. She watched him as he left; he had a regal air about him. Something in the back of her mind told her he was 'somebody' on Vulcan.

 

"I see you met Ambassador Sarek, Amanda," Marcus Grayson said. He took the seat just vacated by Sarek.

 

"Ambassador Sarek?" Amanda looked at her brother with a puzzled look on her face.

 

He was only five years his sister’s senior. "Yes. That was Vulcan's new Ambassador to Earth." 

 

Amanda felt her face go flush. "He must think I'm a total idiot."

 

"Amanda, how could any one think you're an idiot?" He smiled at her as he reached for her hand. "You are the most intelligent woman I know."

 

"Marcus, stop that," she warned her brother. He always had a bad habit of teasing her and right now she just wasn't up to the play.

 

"Stop what? Look at you. You're 25 years old, you're beautiful, and you have your Doctorial in Linguistics, which you received at 22. So to call yourself an idiot just doesn't fit." He smiled at her as he squeezed her hand. His sister was indeed quite accomplished indeed.

Amanda looked at her brother with a smile on her face. "Marcus…I feel like an idiot then. To think I didn't even know who he was."

 

"You know, Amanda, we could sit here all day but like I told the Ambassador, we will be orbiting Vulcan in less than an hour." Marcus got up and reached his hand out to help his sister up.

 

"Yes, I should be getting my things together." She took her brother's outstretched hand. When she rose to her feet she straightened the dress she wore.

 

~-~

 

Sarek sat in his office at the VSA reviewing the coursework for the new semester. After he finished, he turned to his faculty messages reading one that was not so pleasing to him:

 

"All faculty have been assigned a time when they will be attending the new Terran Standard class. It has been brought to the administration's attention, with the greater number of Terran students, there is a need for basic Standard. Although these students read and understand Vulcan, it is logical for their teacher to understand Standard as well. These classes will be for a six-month period. You are to report to Dr. Grayson at your appointed time."

 

Sarek read his appointed time. His class was to meet that very day. Logically, the administration was correct, it would be helpful for most of the instructors to learn Standard. He, however, was not only an instructor, but also Vulcan's Ambassador to Earth, so he felt his Standard needed no help. With a sigh he rose from his desk and left to join this new class with Dr. Grayson.

 

~-~

 

Amanda sat at a student desk; she thought the first class when well, but she knew she would have to be just a bit less emotional for the next class. This class would be full of Vulcan instructors and not students. She was glad they only had her doing two classes a day; that would give her time to record all the translations for Shi'kahr's tourist areas. She had over 300 phrases and stories to translate into Standard. With more humans coming to Vulcan the need of Federation Standard was becoming more necessary.

 

She was so wrapped up in her reading she missed the sound of the door opening. "Where may I find Dr. Grayson?" The familiar voice startled her causing her to jump. When she looked up, she saw the same Vulcan she spoke with briefly on the Challenger.

 

"Ambassador, I am Dr. Amanda Grayson." Once again, she smiled at him. She had to admit he was even more handsome in the current lighting. It better epitomized his features.

 

Sarek lifted his eyebrow and allowed a momentary look of surprise. "I see. Most fortunate." He had hoped to be able see her again; now he would have a logical reason to do so.

 

"To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit, Ambassador Sarek?" Amanda asked him. She was still trying to figure out why someone as important as Sarek would seek her of all people out.

 

As he entered the room he took a seat in the desk next to hers. "I am in your next class, Dr. Grayson."

 

Amanda laughed, "Oh, I see. I thought maybe you were looking for me." Or at least she hoped he was. She gave him a lot of thought since the day she talked to him.

 

"It is most fortunate I found you then, Dr. Grayson," Sarek replied, leaving her to her own conclusions.

 

"Please call me Amanda, I have always hated Dr. Grayson…makes me feel like an old woman," she said, as she smiled at him.

 

"I will call you by your given name, if you in return call me Sarek, when we are talking alone. However you must understand my tradition dictates I call you 'Dr. Grayson', as you would be asked to call me 'Ambassador Sarek' when in more formal settings." He paused, wondering if what he wished to say was appropriate. He decided to say it anyway. "Amanda, you are most definitely not an old woman." It was as much of a compliment to her beauty that, as a Vulcan, Sarek could make.

 

"Why, thank you, Mr. Ambassador," she teased, blushing at his compliment. "I must apologize for not realizing who you where on the Challenger," she said as she looked at her chronometer. "Well, I'd better get everything ready for your class." She got up and walked to the larger desk in the front and took some material out of her attaché case.

 

"No apologizes are needed." He studied the way she moved and was overcome by a wave of desire. It wasn't logical but he wondered what she looked like under the long Vulcan robes she wore.

 

~-~

 

It wasn't long before Sarek was teaching her about Vulcan history and the language. He even explained to her exactly how he was related to Surak, although Amanda couldn't understand it. Sarek took her to each of the visitor spots in Shi'kahr that she had to translate into Standard. Each one had a terminal that explained the history of the given area. It was Amanda's job to clarify what the area was and what significance it had to Vulcan life. Sarek made it easier for her by being a guide. They spent the time it took to arrive at each destination by talking about their lives.

 

"Sarek, may I ask why you have not married yet?" Amanda asked one day. He had spoken about his life but never once mentioned a female to share it with.

 

Sarek looked from the road to Amanda. "I was bonded…what you consider married... to a Vulcan woman named T'Rea. She, however, chose to live life as a Kolinahr, thus she divorced me."

 

"I remember you told me this Kolinahr was where you purge all emotion and commit yourself to total logic," she said as she looked back to Sarek. "That must have been troubling for you."

 

"You are correct in the basic idea of Kolinahr. As for T'Rea…she and I were not bonded out of want, rather out of obligation. Thus it was not 'troubling' as you would say," Sarek explained.

 

"Obligation? You mean your families made you marry her?" Amanda asked with a puzzled look on her face.

 

"Yes, Vulcans are bonded, engaged as you would call it, at seven years of age, and are married as adults," he told her. "My marriage to T'Rea was one of..." He would have to consider his words carefully as to not explain more than tradition allowed. "It is similar to the way your planet's kings and queens arranged marriages for their offspring. Sometimes the children knew nothing of one another and had nothing in common, however, to strengthen the kingdom, these arranged marriages were necessary."

 

"You have never re-bonded to another?" she asked.

 

"No, I am free to choose my own bondmate," he said, as he stopped the skimmer at their destination. He looked over at her once again; these last two and half months had shown him he wanted more. "Amanda, I have told you about T'Rea... tell me, do you have anyone special in your life?"

 

Amanda looked at him with a half smile, "Sarek, I have never taken the time to become close with anyone until…"

 

With an eyebrow raised, he prompted her to finish, "Until what?"

 

Her face became hot and she knew she was blushing. "Until you," she whispered.

 

"I see." Her answer was quite pleasing to hear. Sarek got out of the skimmer and walked around to open the door for her. Holding out his hand he waited for her to take it before he projected feelings not so easily expressed for a Vulcan. Tradition allowed for him to display emotions to a desired bondmate in such a manner, so he could only hope Amanda would understand his intentions.

 

Amada sat there looking at him; she was not a telepath, but she felt his desires, so he must have channeled these thoughts to her. When she stood, she was almost reluctant to drop his hand, but Vulcans didn't show affection the way humans did. With a smile she let go of his hand. "Sarek, thank you."

 

Sarek said no more. He simply nodded his head and led the way to the long deserted temple they were visiting today.

 

~-~

 

 

She smiled at him as she took down her hair. She and Sarek had been seeing each other in a professional manner over the last three months. Then two weeks ago it had turned more personal. Slowly she had learned to relax around him and be more herself. "Sarek, do you mind it I shower and change?" She was still in the outfit she wore to the Academy, and wanted to slip into something a bit more comfortable.

 

Sarek looked at her noticing the sweat that beaded on her forehead. "Amanda, it is more logical for you to be dressed in clothing that is suited to this climate." He found her more attractive in the Terran clothing that she wore in the privacy of her apartment; it showed the shapeliness of her form better, without being overly vulgar.

 

"So, is that a 'no' you don't mind?" she asked as she teased him. 

 

He lifted an eyebrow, "No, I do not mind. I want you to be comfortable. Once you are finished I have a personal issue I would like to talk with you about." He held her eyes and allowed the slightest curve upward of his lips.

 

Amanda had to blink to be sure she saw Sarek's smile. Never before had he smiled at her, even when his eyes smiled. "Sarek, if it's important, I would like to hear about it now." She moved just a bit closer to him; close enough she could smell the natural fragrance of his body. It was a sweet musky smell that sparked a greater desire than she had before with him.

 

Sarek became conscious of Amanda's desires, which only fed his own, but now was not the time to act upon them. He shifted his body so he sat almost touching her thighs. "Very well, Amanda." He paused, and then said, "I find myself desiring to be more to you than simply your teacher or student. I want to be your…bondmate." He reached for her hand. "I want to feel you within me, as you would feel me within you."

 

Amanda looked at the man that sat next to her. "Are you asking me to be your wife?"

 

“I am Amanda, however what I ask is more than that. We would be linked telepathically, aware of each other's thoughts and emotions," Sarek said, as he carefully watched her. 

 

With concern in her eyes, she said, "I am human. I can't read thoughts and I surely wouldn't be able to keep thoughts I wished to keep private…private."

 

Sarek smiled slightly as he took in her concerns. "I can close my mind until such a time that you are able to shield your thoughts."

 

Amanda smiled at him, "Sarek, I have to think about this." She knew in her heart she wanted to be with him; she had from almost the first day she saw him, but the mental link troubled her.

 

Sarek lifted his hand to her jaw. As he did, he felt her mixture of fear and desire. He brought her face closer to his and did what he had seen actors in Terran holovids do. He planted his lips to hers and kissed them. The sweet nectar of her lips only fed his desire to be one with her. Once he released her, he told her, "I want to be yours in the ways of both our worlds. You unleash a desire within me that should only happen during pon farr."

"Pon Farr?" she asked, still breathless from the kiss.

 

"It is the Vulcan mating cycle…not a subject broached with offworlders. But for you to consider being my bondmate, you must know everything. During pon farr, the Vulcan male loses all sense of logic and is overcome by the need to mate. Nothing is more important than mating, not even food or sleep. It can be a vicious and painful experience for the female. She must use the bond to control the madness of the male; if it is not controlled, it could mean the death of both of them. This cycle is repeated every seventh year of the adult male's life." Sarek watched for any reactions to his words. 

 

Amanda just sat back listening; his words were frightening to her. Her eyes lost the blue hue they normally had and took on almost a complete black appearance. She was not sure she liked the prospect of having her virginity taken in such a manner. But she did love Sarek and knew he was the only one she wanted to give that part of herself to. "How long before your next pon farr?" 

 

"I last underwent pon farr 6.25 years ago," Sarek, told her, still watching her reactions. He saw she seemed frightened. "Amanda, what is it? What brings out this emotion in you?"

 

She looked at the man she loved; he would not understand her fear. All she knew was she didn't want her virginity ripped away savagely. "Sarek, I do not know the physiology of the Vulcan female but a human female has a thin membrane called the hymen. It remains intact until the female…" She wasn't sure what to say since they had never before discussed anything of a sexual nature.

 

Sarek watched her waiting for her to continue. If she was to be his wife then logically she should be able to talk about personal issues with him. "Please continue Amanda. We both must understand one another if we are to be bonded."

 

With a light sigh, she carried on. "When a female's vagina is entered for the first time the hymen is broken by the male's…penis. I have been told this can be a painful act as the membrane is ripped away." Her voice was soft and shaky.

 

With a raised eyebrow Sarek carefully took in Amanda's words. More importantly, he noted the fact she had only been told and had not experienced it first-hand. "You are correct when you say Vulcan females have no such membrane. Would I be correct in stating you have not had this experience then?" Though it wasn't logical, he was pleased that she had not been with another male in such a manner. With her nod, he added, "Then, is it your fear of it being ripped in the savageness of pon farr?" He waited a few moments for her answer.

 

"Yes, you said Pon Farr could be painful to the female. For me, the first time I…engage in sexual relations would be painful enough with out the added pain of pon farr." She had heard that the Vulcan male's penis was larger then a human's and shaped differently.

 

"Amanda, I assure you this does not have to happen during pon farr. I am quite capable of joining with you outside of my Time. In fact, I would prefer to do so, so that you may know the…pleasures we would have outside of pon farr first." Sarek moved his hand to rest on her leg letting his desires move across the contact.

 

Amanda looked at him once again wide-eyed this time, not with fear, but with wonder. She could feel his desire to be one with her, both as a bondmate and as a lover. If the joining of minds and bodies were necessary to be his wife, then she would do it. "Sarek, how do we bond?"

 

With a faint smile, he said, "We are adults. Although you are human, I believe we can bond on our own. Once Pon Farr comes upon me we will be married in a Vulcan ceremony called the 'koon-ut-kalifee'," Sarek said as he moved his hand from her leg to her hand. His heart beat faster in anticipation of being one with her. The desire he held since the day he first met her told him it was only logical that he claim her as his bondmate.

 

With a smile, Amanda whispered, "Then we should bond." She laid her other hand atop his and squeezed it hopefully projecting her willingness to bond.

 

Once Amanda released his hands, Sarek reached for the meld points on her face. "I will not harm you Amanda. It may be frightening to you but I will not harm you. My mind will reach into yours locking a part me within you. Once I have placed myself in you, I will bring your mind into mine. Remember this, I will not enter into parts of your mind other than the part necessary for the bond."

 

Ever so gently he projected all his hopes and desires into her mind sealing the better parts of his self deep within the mind of the woman who would be his wife; feeling both her fears and her longing to be one with him--all the tender emotions that made her the woman he cherished. He couldn't help but feel a sense of pride at how controlled her mind was for a human. Once he was certain the bond was set firmly in place, he withdrew, lowering his hands.

 

Amanda's eyes glistened with tears of joy. "Sarek, this feels more complete than anything I have ever known. I love you so much," she whispered. She looked at the man she was now bonded to with a graceful smile and nod. Slowly she got up to make her way to the sonic shower looking over her shoulder. "Care to join me?" she asked with a suggestive sway of her hips.

 

Sarek raised an eyebrow at her seductive look. "Amanda, it is not logical that we shower together."

 

His words caused her to laugh. "No, Sarek, it isn't supposed to be logical. It's supposed to be fun." She tried to give him a mental picture of what she meant; how she wanted them to learn about one another by exploring each other. She was still afraid but her desire to be one with him overrode her fears.

 

The images Amanda was broadcasting in her mind served both to invoke his curiosity and his arousal. He had told her he would take her before his Time, and she wanted that time to be now. He could feel her desires mixed with her fears. With a raised eyebrow and a slight smile, he replied, "Yes, I can see how it would be…most interesting."

 

Sarek watched Amanda disappear around the corner knowing she would be undressing and waiting for him to join her. He felt caught between a double-edged sword; one edge of it was his culture and discipline, the other Amanda's human nature that didn't fully understand his ways. If he chose to follow his upbringing, he ran the risk of Amanda rejecting him when it was time for the koon-ut-kalifee, during a time when he could not afford rejection. As he did many times in his professional life, he set aside his logic and gave way to the idea of pleasing this human he had choosing to bond with.

 

As he rose from the couch, he removed his Vulcan robe leaving on only the pants and tunic that he wore underneath. When he reached Amanda's bedroom he watched her fiddle with her dress a moment. Silently he walked behind her and placed his hands over the bindings that held it together, removing each one. When he had the last binding undone he turned her towards him and slipped the dress off her shoulders watching as it floated to the ground.

 

Today he would show her what it meant to be a Vulcan and let her show him what it meant to be a human. With two fingers he caressed her jaw line and down her neck. He could feel Amanda's desires intensify. "Am I to shower as I am?" he asked in a playful manner.

 

She blinked, still shocked at the way he was touching. "I believe I can fix that, Sarek." She reached her hand out and grasped the fasteners of his tunic. Once she had them all unfastened she moved the fabric off his shoulders, touching his chest on the way down.

 

Once she had removed his clothing, they walked into the sonic shower where Sarek washed her feet in the sonic waves. Slowly he moved up her body studying her delicate form as he went. She was even tinier than he originally surmised. Her body was a tan in color and soft as silk. "This is indeed a most fascinating experience," he told her as his gaze met her eyes.

 

"Yes, and I believe it would be more so with a water shower," she said as she moved her mouth towards his. It wasn't until she peered down that she saw him in his finest. His body was toned and somewhat muscular without being overly so. She could see the rippling muscles of his abdomen as he breathed in and out. Gently she rubbed her hands over his chest, circumventing the nipples as she moved down.

 

Sarek positioned his two fingers over the folds of his lover's opening, allowing them to hover there until he felt her desire to be touched. Slowly he slid his fingers into the chamber that awaited him below. As his fingers glided into her opening, his teeth played with the soft flesh of her nipples. Her flesh was cool against his skin enticing him to want to be fully inside of her. His fingers moved in a slow tempo as her muscles tightened around them.

 

Waves of passion washed over Amanda as her back was held tightly against the shower wall. Never before had she envisioned that the simple act of foreplay would bring out such desires. Her breathing quickened and she was getting to a point where she had to have more, yet she still had a fear of the unknown pain that would be the end of her innocence. With a ragged breath she whispered, "I want to feel *you* in me, Sarek."

 

Sarek heard the desire in her voice and felt it dance across his thoughts. With a smile he would only give to her, he gathered her into his arms taking her the distance from the sonic shower to the bed. Easing her onto the bed he moved his body to line up atop hers. His member rested on her stomach as he moved his mouth to cover hers. After a passion-filled kiss, he asked her, "You are sure you want this?"

 

With a smile she reached down and took hold of him, guiding him to her awaiting chamber. "Sarek, I have never been more ready in my life." She projected images of him moving within her, filling her with his seed.

 

Those thoughts were all he needed to thrust his body forward, causing his penis to slip just inside her. The cool wet feel of her skin against his heated sex simulated him in a way he never imagined. He was met with a resistance that had not been there with T'Rea; a resistance he was determined to overcome.

 

The pain of the ripping flesh caused Amanda to tense her body, but she held her eyes locked to the man she loved, the man she was giving herself to.

"As I cherish you, Amanda." When Sarek felt her tense underneath him, he placed his hand on her head blocking the pain she was experiencing. Once he controlled her pain, he thrust hard, breaking the barrier that stood between her folds and the inner sanctum that awaited him. The tightness of her chamber hugged him as he moved within her. He reveled in the coolness of her flesh against him and moved in a rhythmic tempo until he felt the sensation that told him they would both find release. He pulled back to the edge of her entrance and drove deep, ejecting his seed within her. 

 

Amanda felt the hot sensation of Sarek's semen being released into her, as her own body spasmed with her own orgasm. With a raspy voice, she yelled out, "Oh my God, Sarek!" She reached up to pull his lips down on her, kissing him. Over time she knew they would learn more about one another's desires; tonight however, she was just happy she had given the most of herself to the man she loved.

 

Sarek allowed himself to be pulled onto her. He returned her kiss with all the passion she brought into it. After their passions settled a bit, his eyebrow rose at her thoughts of what was yet to come. "These thoughts you are projecting are most fascinating." He pushed himself off her and laid next to her in the bed.

 

Amanda looked at Sarek's face and blushed. "This is going to take some getting use to."

 

Sarek let his lips turn in a slight smile as he traced the outline of her jaw. Allowing his shields to drop briefly, he projected outwards to her. You will adjust, he assured her. We will work on your shields. Over time you will learn to block your mind from me.

 

Amanda felt his mind reaching through hers as she heard his unspoken words everywhere inside her. It was startling at first, but it was also loving and warm. "Oh, I hope so," she replied aloud as she caught his fingers with her teeth.

 

Chapter 2

 

It had been a three-week wait before Sarek was able to contact Ambassador Kennedy, Earth's Ambassador to Vulcan, to arrange for a Federation wedding ceremony. Once the Ambassador had agreed to perform the ceremony, the plans were quickly made and Sarek and Amanda were married right at the Terran Embassy. Since Amanda was still a citizen of Earth, their marriage would not be acknowledged by the Terran government unless they were married under a Federation ceremony, just as Vulcan would not acknowledge the marriage until after the Koon-ut-kalifee.

 

The symbolic nature of their marriage showed that two separate worlds could be weaved into one union, much like Vulcan and Earth had done to form the Federation. They chose to keep their wedding as quiet as possible for both security and privacy. Too many highly publicized marriages ended from the strain that notoriety alone placed on it. Amanda had been concerned that the differences in their philosophies would be enough of a strain.

 

As an Ambassador, having a wife that was charismatic as well as refined, was greatly desired. Amanda possessed these traits and more, which logically made her an admirable wife for him. They both agreed that their differences would only make their marriage stronger over time.

 

~-~

 

Amanda bolted straight out of bed; her heart raced as she attempted to organize her thoughts. How many nights had it been since she first dreamed of giving birth to a grossly deformed child? Why did it always have to be the same dream?

 

There she was, in the middle of teaching her class when she went into labor. She hadn't known she was pregnant when she felt the stabbing pain of contractions. Within minutes she was lying in a pool of blood and in her arms was a baby…or at least that's what she thought it was. It had budding arms and legs, and its torso was disfigured. The head had skin covering the nose, mouth, and eyes. The heart beat on the outside of its body. The blood following through the veins, clearly visible beneath the translucent skin, was a dirty looking brown.

 

Amanda wiped the tears from her eyes and attempted to control the fear stabbing at her heart. Her love for Sarek had blinded her to the fact that she would probably have mutant children with him, and she could not accept that possibility. It was easier for her just to accept the fact she would never be able to have a child with the man she loved. Oh God, Sarek…what have we done, she thought to herself, wishing that now of all times, Sarek could be with her instead of off-world performing his duty for the government. He had been called away less than forty-eight hours after their wedding at the Terran Embassy, and he’d been gone for almost an entire month. 

 

A soft presence filled her mind comforting her. We will have children, Amanda. She should have been angry with him for invading her thoughts after he had promised he wouldn't, but right now, it was comforting.

 

Hesitantly, she responded to the calming presence in her mind. We are so different Sarek, how can we?

 

Where is this faith you tell me so much about? he responded, trying to ease her fears. If it were feasible, he would find a way even if he had to spend a lifetime doing it. Now please rest. We will talk more of this upon my return.

 

Amanda laid back in the bed still slightly shaken, but feeling more comforted than she would have without his reassurance. With one final thought she closed her eyes. I love you so, Sarek.

 

 

~-~

 

When Amanda awoke in the morning, she found the comm unit flashing with a waiting message. As she watched Sarek's face appear on the screen, her remaining fears disappeared. "Amanda, I have arranged a meeting with my physician upon my return to Vulcan. The debates are being concluded at this moment and I anticipate returning to you within the week. If we are to begin our family during my upcoming pon farr it will be necessary to begin tests immediately."

 

Amanda smiled at his face. Sarek, I miss you so much, she thought to herself.

 

~-~

 

Together they sat in Healer Sorel's office. The battery of tests they had both been put through had been quite taxing, however, as long as it helped them to conceive and produce a healthy child, it would be well worth it. Amanda glanced at Sarek. "Sarek, do you think it will ever happen?"

 

Sarek looked his wife. "Amanda there has been enough study on this to suggest it is indeed possible."

 

Amanda gave Sarek a slight smile. "I hope so. I want so much to have a child with you."

 

"I, too, would be most pleased to share a child with you," Sarek said, hoping to put her more at ease.

 

Their private moment was broken by the healer's return to the room. "The tests are completed. There are a great number of differences in your genetic makeup, the most significant being the additional chromosome in the Vulcan genetic structure. The process of altering your chromosomes will be reasonably uncomplicated; we will use the required chromosome from Sarek, which will produce a prominently Vulcan child.

 

"The greater danger is the incompatibility of the blood. Vulcan blood contains copper whereas human blood is made up of iron. As a human, Amanda, the additional copper that would be present in your blood could cause damage to your body." He looked directly at Amanda. "I will contact the human healer, Daniel Corrigan, as he would better understand your physiology. There can be no room for error, as it could risk your life as well as the child's. You will also need to spend time on a mixture of fertility drugs to produce a greater number of eggs than you normally would."

 

Sarek watched Sorel. They had known each other all their lives, being friends since childhood, and he had been Sarek’s personal healer for many, many years. Sorel knew him better than any other healer on Vulcan ever could; and that, along with his desire to see his friend pleased in life, meant that logically Sarek knew if anyone could give them a child, it would be him. "My next pon farr is in eight point two five months. Would it be feasible to say we can conceive at that time, or will it be during my next Time?"

 

The healer returned his gaze to Sarek. "It should be feasible, however, you must let us know as soon as the first symptoms appear, approximately one week prior. It is imperative we get the needed genetic material before you fully enter your cycle."

 

Amanda, who had been sitting back listening to the conversation, asked, "You're saying it is possible for us to have children?"

 

"Yes, however, it may not happen right away," Sorel told her as he gazed at her. "I will have my assistant contact the human healer as you will need to start treatment immediately."

 

Amanda gave him a light smile. "I'll do what ever I must to give us a child."

 

"That could very possibly mean finding a donor host for the embryo," Sorel said.

 

"You mean someone else would carry my child?" Amanda asked as her eyes widened.

 

"You must accept that as a possibility," Sorel told her.

 

She nodded as she watched Sarek, who sat unmoved by the discussion at hand. Inside she was joyous and scared to death, but it angered her that Sarek could just sit there so calmly. For a second time since their marriage, she felt she had made a mistake. Could she live her life without the emotional support of her husband?

 

Sarek watched her with a slightly raised eyebrow; the slightest glimpse of anger she let him see disturbed him. However, if he was to be a husband to a human wife he must be able to accept her emotions--even the anger. "If you are ready Amanda, we must be leaving."

 

"Thank you for your time, Sorel," Amanda said with a smile, something she knew over time she would have to learn to curb. She stood and looked at Sarek. "I'm ready."

 

"Very well, Amanda," he said as he stood. Turning to Sorel, he said, "Notify me as soon as the human physician is able to see Amanda." Sarek nodded to the doorway and watched as Amanda moved past him into the hallway. With an almost unnoticeable sigh, he wondered how long she would remain silent this time. She had a propensity to close herself off whenever she was displeased about some offense he had committed, intentional or not. When they had exited the building and found themselves alone in the Vulcan Science Academy courtyard, Sarek grabbed her arm to keep her from walking off without him. He pulled her off the main walkway and spoke softly, in case someone should come near. "Amanda, it is not that I am unconcerned. I hope you will be able to carry the child yourself; however, if you cannot, then a surrogate mother will be a choice we must make. Either way, Amanda, you will be the mother of our children."

 

She looked at her husband, offering a slight smile. "I know it is my health, as well as the health of our child that must be considered. I just don't want to feel worthless if I cannot carry our baby."

 

"You will never be worthless, Amanda. I would not have chosen a wife that is without worth," Sarek said as he led her to their waiting skimmer. He had been gone from his wife for three weeks and didn't want his first night home to be destroyed by the tension already between them.

 

~-~

 

Amanda sat alone in Dr. Corrigan's office as he explained the process that would allow her to carry a Vulcan child to term. It all sounded simple enough. A special lining would be implanted into her womb, which would allow her blood to enter her child but would filter out the iron; just as it would filter out and break down the copper that she would receive in exchange. Another function of the lining was to allow for the difference in pH levels necessary in utero. "…the most important thing you must remember is once this is in place and the fertilized egg is implanted, you must not do any lifting or sudden twists or movements. The lining can easily be dislodged by any violent jars, which could cause a miscarriage or the additional copper to be transferred to your blood stream. "

 

Amanda looked at him confused. "Will I have to be on bed rest?" If it meant giving Sarek a healthy child, she would gladly do it. She had already informed the Vulcan Science Academy she would be willing to stay on as a teacher but she would have to take some time for medical reasons.

 

"No, I will keep you under medical supervision, but you have to agree you won't do anything strenuous. This means after the implantation any intimate relations you and Sarek have are out of the question until we can be sure the pregnancy has reached a safe stage." Vulcans were not ones to talk about their sexual relations with others, but Daniel knew they talked to their healers when need be. He also knew Sorel would have a similar discussion with Sarek.

 

Amanda felt the blood flow to her cheeks; that was a part of their life she greatly enjoyed. She even believed Sarek got as much pleasure out of it as she did. He seemed to enjoy seeing how much he could make her squirm with desire. Shaking her head slightly, she forced the memories out of her head, and turned her attention back to Dr. Corrigan. "Whatever I have to do for our child, I will."

 

"Good, Amanda. Now let's get you started on the fertility treatment that will produce the number of eggs we will need over the next three months," Dr. Corrigan said as he prepared an injection for her. He and Sorel had decided to harvest no less than twelve healthy eggs. They had calculated a 75.364% failure rate, which would leave them with at least three fertilized eggs.

 

The most complicated part of the process would be splicing Sarek's needed chromosome with Amanda's and then rearranging them, so each of Amanda's chromosomes were matched to Sarek's. This meant an almost total rearrangement of Amanda's twenty-three chromosomes to match the configuration of Sarek's. It had been more logical to manipulate hers, as it was already necessary to add the extra chromosome.

 

After Amanda received her injection, she prepared to leave. With a smile she said, "Thank you for your help."

 

Dr. Corrigan smiled back at her. "Don't thank me until you have a healthy baby in your arms."

 

"Oh, when I have a healthy baby, I bet you’ll get a lot of thanks from others in the Federation," she said with a smile. "I’d better be going. I have to meet with Sarek in fifteen minutes.”

 

~-~

 

While Amanda was meeting with Dr. Corrigan, Sarek used the chance to meet and talk with Sorel about his upcoming pon farr. He had been concerned Amanda would not be able to withstand the violence of his Time the way T'Rea had. Pon farr was a topic only addressed with one's healer or bondmate; Amanda obviously would not be able to assist him, but Sarek was confident Sorel could find a logical way to help him with his concerns--no matter how illogical they were.

 

After explaining his trepidation, Sorel said, "It would be logical to have a healer attend you instead of the customary family elder. Your concerns are logical as Amanda has never been through pon farr, and because she is human and will be undergoing fertility treatments, it will be possible for her to injure easily. I can arrange for a nurse to attend you…however she will be required to monitor your pon farr."

 

Sarek raised his eyebrow. "Monitor?" The thought of having anyone watching him undergo his Time made him uncomfortable, however, under the circumstances he would be willing to allow it. He could only hope the nurse's medical experience would not be needed.

 

"Yes, Sarek, she will place an audio monitor in the room you choose. She will wear a communicator that will allow her to pick up any unusual sounds from Amanda," Sorel explained.

 

Sarek almost lost his emotional control at the thought of what the nurse would find unusual. "In that case it should be known that Amanda can be quite...vocal during copulation."

 

Sorel raised his eyebrow; Vulcans were generally not vocal when mating. However, Amanda was human, and as such, may not respond in the typical Vulcan fashion. "Be sure Amanda advises her of this fact, or if you prefer, I can have Dr. Corrigan advise her."

 

"I will speak with Amanda. If she feels she would rather tell the nurse, I am sure she will," Sarek said, feeling somewhat uncomfortable with the direction this meeting had turned, even though he was the one that had started the discussion.

 

"Very well, Sarek. Remember to return when you develop the first symptoms of pon farr, as your fertile period will begin shortly after that. We will need to obtain the strongest sperm possible, and, as you are aware, later in your cycle, there will be no chance in collecting the needed donation," Sorel reminded Sarek.

 

Sarek nodded. "I will remember," he said as he rose to leave the room. He would have to tell Amanda the first signs to look for as well. They were simple enough; increased emotionalism and an inability to meditate. Lastly, the one he was sure Amanda would notice the most, a stronger sexual desire.

 

~-~

 

Amanda sat quietly at a corner table in the Vulcan Science Academy cafeteria as she waited for Sarek. The injection made her quite hungry, however, what she was hungry for could not be found on Vulcan. Not to mention the idea of her eating a thick hamburger with extra onions would probably make Sarek ill. As her stomach growled, she sighed. When would he ever get here? The thought of him running late for a change amused her.

 

"Amanda," he said as he sat at the table. He could not tolerate tardiness, now he was the one keeping someone waiting. "I regret that I have been detained. If you are ready we can eat."

 

“Well I guess I can forgive you this time,” Amanda teased, as she smiled at him. "Honestly Sarek, what I really want I can't get here…or anywhere on Vulcan for that matter."

 

"That would be?" Sarek asked knowing that if she wanted something Vulcan did not have, it would be made of animal flesh.

 

Amanda frowned and said, "A nice thick hamburger with extra onions. I would have thought odd cravings would start after the pregnancy as is common for humans."

 

Sarek looked at her. As much as he detested the thought of her consuming meat, it was a small thing he could put up with as she prepared to have their child. "I will see what can be arranged Amanda." Just because she ate it didn't mean he had to be around at the time. "In the meantime, what would you like that Vulcan is able to offer?"

 

"A salad would be fine," she said with a smile. Sarek went to retrieve a salad for each of them and when he returned, Amanda said, "Dr. Corrigan started my treatments today."

 

"I am pleased to hear this. Once we finish eating, we will return home. There is a highly personal matter we must speak of, but only in private," Sarek informed her.

 

Amanda had learned over the past few weeks whenever Sarek said this it had something to do with their making love. "Very well, Sarek."

 

"First, we will check the progress of our new home," Sarek said, as he ate some salad. He had chosen an area on his family's land that was at the base of the L-langon Mountains. It was cooler in midsummer there, thus better suited for her.

 

~-~

 

Sarek sat on the couch next to his wife. He found it easy to just sit and gaze into her deep blues eyes. However, he had to talk to her about the arrangements that had been made concerning his pon farr. "Amanda, Sorel believes it would be best for you to understand the signs of pon farr. This will be necessary so that we can be certain they collect the sperm samples to fertilize your eggs before it is too late. Essentially, the signs are increased emotionalism, inability to meditate, and a stronger sexual desire."

 

"Oh, you mean you will become emotional…like happy or angry?" Amanda asked, as she wanted to make sure she understood what to look for.

 

Sarek's eyebrow rose. "I will be easier to agitate. It will be similar to your over emotionalism during your PMS period, yet it will be ten times more so. There may be times I may say or act in a way that could be hurtful to you. Remember, it will not be who I truly am, but the strain the chemical imbalance places on my control."

 

Amanda looked at him with a frown. "I am not overly emotional at those times in my cycle."

 

"So it is not PMS that makes you cry, or become easily angered?" Sarek asked in a rather teasing manner.

 

Amanda smiled as she shook her head. "Okay, it could be. You did also say increased sexual desire right?" She liked the way that sounded especially since this new fertility medication seemed to already increase her desires.

 

Sarek could sense where this was going to take them. "Yes, and logically that will not be an issue for you." He knew she would be happy to deal with this part of his Time.

 

"No, it won't," she said as she moved closer to him hoping to get the chance to make him prove his point.

 

"Amanda, one day your desires are going to tax even my stamina," Sarek said with a slight playful tone to his voice.

 

"Oh! I hope not, Sarek. Your stamina is what I love the most about you," she teased. There were other things, but it was the one thing that compensated for the lack of displayed emotion.

 

He allowed the slightest curve of his lips. "Yes, Amanda, I do believe that is what you 'love' the most about me," he said as he raised his eyebrow. “This brings me to my next topic. Sorel has concerns the treatment you will be undergoing will make it easier for you to be injured during my upcoming pon far. He insists on an audio monitor during our mating."

 

"An audio monitor?" Amanda asked.

 

"Yes," Sarek said as he brushed a piece of hair off her face. "A nurse will monitor us to make sure you are not being overly harmed…I did inform him you might react differently than a Vulcan would, however."

 

"And how do I act different than Vulcans?" Amanda asked.

 

Sarek lifted an eyebrow once again. "Amanda, to my understanding Vulcans do not say things like, 'Oh, my God' or 'Yes, yes' at the top of their lungs when mating."

 

"They don't? Then who was it that screamed out my name the last time we mated?" Amanda asked as she smiled. "Because I know whoever it was had pointed ears just like yours."

 

Sarek took a deep breath. "That was not the Vulcan norm either, Amanda; however it was what you desired, therefore, it was logical."

 

"Oh, Mr. Ambassador, your logic will get you nowhere this time," she said as she moved her hand across his cheek and down his jaw.

 

Sarek felt her desire as she touched his face, which only fed his own. "Perhaps logic could still be used in this case. Would it not be more logical to either cease this action or to move to the bed?" At this point, he had no desire to stop, as he found it much more pleasing to mate than to utilize the bio-control it would take to return to a normal state of being.

 

"Oh, do you want to see who can get whom to scream first?" Amanda teased as she played with the tip of his right ear.

 

"Amanda, we already know 'that is a game you would lose' as you are so fond of saying," Sarek said as he removed her hand from his jaw and rose from the couch. He pulled her to a standing position then lifted her with no more effort than it would take to lift a child.

 

Her eyes never left his, as he carried her to their bed. "Sarek, my love." She rested her head on his shoulder.

 

It didn't take long to divest each other of their clothing, or to feel each other's desires. He sat her on the bed and positioned himself next to her. 

 

Slowly he began to rub her face with both his fingertips tracing her features. Drawing his face to hers, he kissed the curves of her ears. This sent shivers down her body, yet she refused to utter a word, biting the inside of her bottom lip instead.

 

In response she slid her hands down his chest, teasing him by allowing the tip of her nails to circle his nipples, sending him the same erotic images he was giving her as he kissed her. After neither of them could stand the actions any longer, he whispered to her, "Lay back."

 

As she did, he moved her so her femininity faced him. Gently he worked her opening with his fingers. Once he was sure she reached a level of excitement that would keep him from hurting her, he maneuvered himself into her. She let out a light gasp of air as he thrust himself into her.

 

When she still refused to cry out in ecstasy, the animalistic instincts of his ancestors took over causing him to be more intense. It was clear she fully intended to make him give in first. "Amanda, you are most illogical," he said with a raspy voice.

 

His body bucked and when he felt himself about ready to explode, he gave a few final hard thrusts and released himself deep into her body. "My wife," he said before he pressed his lips to hers. Before he collapsed, he shifted his weight, so he wouldn’t hurt her.

 

She looked into his eyes once again. "And you, my dear, lost the game," she said as she laughed.

 

~-~

 

Time passed quickly and before Amanda knew it, she was undergoing the Koon-ut-kalifee. Thankfully, it was mid-winter and the age-old site was on the cool side this time of day. Amanda couldn't help but to note how handsome Sarek looked in his marital robe, just as she knew he thought she was becoming in her robes. Soon it would be over and the mating of pon farr would start.

 

~~~

 

Sarek looked at the woman that was now his wife, by both the laws of the Federation and Vulcan. She stood before him in all her feminine glory, and yet she appeared scared to death. Using what little sanity Sarek had left[,] he assured her, "I would never intentionally harm you. If I do, yell out the word kroy'kah, which means stop. The nurse will come to your aid and it is the only thing I will obey. Do not fight me…I do not wish to harm or kill you." With that said, he left no time for her reply.

 

She trembled inside as she felt the fires of his body growing stronger, and the forcefulness of his mind in hers. She smiled at him shyly. This was her husband, and she had given him her body other times. Why should this be different?

 

Lifting her into his arms, he placed his lips against hers in a feverish assault on her mouth. He forcefully spread her legs and held tight to her arms. She struggled briefly as he did this. "Amanda, do not fight, I do not want to hurt you." With that, he entered her body. There was no love or tenderness as before, only a cold hunger. The shear size and force of his masculinity entering her body hurt. Before, he had at least made sure she was ready to take him. This time she had not been. The increased size ripped away at her. She wanted to cry out in pain, as the act was as forceful as rape. She wanted only to get away; to stop the pain, but she knew he had prepared her for this. She could yell out, as she knew the nurse would come, but she instead practiced what Sarek had taught her and used her mind to control some of the pain.

 

It wasn't long before his movements caused her to become aroused. Though the experience was mostly painful, it was proving to be quite pleasurable as well. She smiled as he released her arms at the same time his hot seed poured into her body. This cleared his mind for a moment, and a tear came to his eye. "Amanda, I am sorry."

 

Seeing the tears in his eyes, she tried to reassure him, "Sarek, yes the act hurt but I was a willing partner." She leaned towards him and kissed him, pulling him back to her.

 

He got up and noticed the small pool of blood coming from her body. "I will get the nurse." He walked over and retrieved a robe.

 

Once the nurse examined her, he was horrified to learn he had ripped her body to the point she would require surgery to correct it. Until that time, she would be given a local anesthetic to kill the pain.

 

Once the nurse was gone and Sarek was back beside her, she wrapped her arms around him. "I love you, Sarek." She willed him to continue; this time the pain was gone and she could focus on what she was told she must do to control his madness before it completely controlled them.

 

The next three days were spent in much the same fashion; most of their time taken up by coupling. Amanda wished she would of thought of some form of lubrication, as there were times he was ready to mount her before her body was.

 

Upon the completion of his pon farr, her femininity was so badly bruised and tattered, she hurt to even walk. Feeling her pain and having great guilt over the past four days, he said, "Allow me to join your mind in a healing meld, Amanda. It will help your body begin the process of healing."

 

Smiling, she accepted his offer. He placed his hand on her temples to ease the pain. This woman was his wife, someone he would cherish forever, and his very nature caused her physical injury.

 

"'It is illogical to protest against one’s nature', I do believe, is a very fitting phrase at this time." She smiled as she touched his fingers in the customary Vulcan fashion. "Sarek, I know what to expect the next time your pon farr comes and what I will need to do to better prepare for it."

 

~-~

 

Dr. Corrigan and Sorel jointly decided that due to her injuries, if Amanda were to undergo the procedure at this time, she would have to spend the next several weeks in the hospital. They were left with little hope that she would heal properly in time to carry the child that would have been implanted in eleven days. The tears to her vaginal walls were easy to repair, but the more persistent complication was her cervix that had been not only stretched but also slightly ripped.

 

Between his teaching duties at the Vulcan Science Academy and his job as ambassador, he would stay with her when he could, seeing to her needs. This time when he came, he brought her something that astonished her; a nice thick hamburger with extra onions.

 

Sarek raised his eyebrow at her puzzled look. "I am the Ambassador to Earth. It is not difficult to get what one needs."

 

Amanda took a bite of the hamburger. It melted in her mouth. "This is quite good, Sarek, but you really didn't have to do this."

 

"Do you like the meatless hamburger?" he asked, as he sat at the foot of her bed. "I was told that it would taste and look like real meat. The company that produces these just opened in Shi'kahr to provide them for the growing human population here."

 

Amanda laughed, "You know, I would have never known it wasn't meat. It has the same smoky taste of dad's old grill." She looked at his puzzled expression. “A grill is a way to cook meat over a fire and the smoke from this fire gives the meat a different taste than if it were fried or broiled. I always loved the taste of smoked meat," Amanda said with a smile. If the rest of the food this new company made was this tasty she would not have to worry too much about any meat cravings she might get.

 

With a slightly turned stomach, Sarek replied, "That, my wife, is something I will take your word on."

 

"Yes, I guess you would," she said with a smile and reached out her two fingers to him.

 

Lightly he caressed his wife’s fingers with his own. To save his now churning stomach, Sarek thought it best to change the subject. "The contractors have told me that our house will be finished by the end of the month. Once you are released we will move into our new home." Sarek pulled out a small booklet, which he handed to Amanda. “Here is the catalog from Earth you requested."

 

Amanda looked at the catalog in Sarek's hand. "Oh, I already have an idea of what I want. I am just not sure how to blend it with your things."

 

"There is no doubt that you will find away to bring our worlds together. I have taken the liberty of ordering one item while the house was being built so that it might be added at that time," Sarek said. His surprise was one he knew she would enjoy greatly.

 

Amanda sat up more in the bed and looked into her husband's deep brown eyes. "Sarek, you are quite a wonder at times."

 

~-~

Out of fifteen viable zygotes, four of them had developed correctly to produce a child. Amanda asked the zygote's sex be unlabeled so they would not know the baby's gender. She didn't like the idea of the surprise being taken away as it could be with this type of pregnancy.

 

The process of transferring the lining and the month old zygote into Amanda's womb was a simple one. After a period of three weeks of being inside her body, the embryo had begun to develop normally. Amanda, now technically almost two months pregnant, had been allowed to return to her new home. She saw the lovely courtyard that made up the front of the house. She took in a deep breath smelling the Terran and local flora. "This is lovely Sarek."

 

He opened the door for her and placed his hand on her back as they entered.

Amanda admired the way Terran and Vulcan furnishings blended to form the perfect union of harmony and beauty. She looked at her husband and said, "You did this?"

 

"Yes, however, you may change whatever you desire," Sarek said

 

An old style upright piano stood in the corner of the living room along with an even older Vulcan ka'athyra or harp as offworlders called it. Her mind could already hear the music that would be played to soothe a young baby. In another corner stood a similar grandfather clock to the one in her parent's home, surrounded by some odd looking Vulcan artifacts. She looked at the items in wonder. 

 

"They are ancient weaponry." It was Sarek's voice behind her.

 

Turning to meet his eyes she looked puzzled. "I thought Vulcans abhorred violence, yet you have these in our home?"

 

Sarek explained to her. "Yes, we do. Our own past was more deadly and violent than Earth's. They are merely a reminder of that fact." He took down a simple looking sword, similar to a machete on Earth. Handing it to her, he explained, "We must be reminded of our painful past once in a while to prevent us from repeating it."

 

"It is quite breathtaking, Sarek," she said as she admired the artifact.

 

"Perhaps you should rest, my wife." Taking her hand, he guided her through the house to the master bedroom. She walked into the room seeing how nicely it was set up, noticing one item that seemed most out of place. "Sarek, how in the world did you get this?" She was looking at the oversized marble tub centered in the bathroom.

 

Sarek raised an eyebrow at the delightful look on his wife's face. "It is only logical that, since you enjoy bubble baths, I get you a tub that would provide ample room for this."

 

Amanda smiled, as she looked from the tub her husband. "Sarek, the tub is big enough for two."

 

"Yes, it is. You have told me before it can be most rewarding," he said as he pulled her gently against him. "The water it uses will be filtered and recycled, providing clean water on a continuous basis."

 

"Sarek, please don't start something we cannot finish," Amanda said as she smiled.

 

He laid her on the bed and offered a smile to her. He lay down next to her and said, "Let me show another way a Vulcan mates." 

 

He filled her mind with passion so vivid that her body reacted to it as if it were real. Never in her wildest dreams would she ever think that she could be taken to such levels of unbridled lust without the physical act. Once she had reached the plateau of her desires, he slowly brought her back down to a normal level. "That, my wife, is how most Vulcans 'make love' outside of pon farr."

 

"Sarek that was…beautiful." With only the power of imagination, he had taken her to worlds she had only heard of in his stories.

 

Chapter 3

 

The incessant chime of the comm unit woke Sarek. Looking over at his sleeping wife, he quietly eased himself out of the Terran made king sized bed and activated the unit. “Sarek here," he said in a whisper.

 

"This is Syrul at the Vulcan Science Academy, Ambassador Sarek. There is an urgent call from Earth for your wife," the voice on the other end replied.

 

Sarek wondered why a call for his wife was sent to the Vulcan Science Academy, but he simply said, "Very well. Please forward it." Using the audio-only setting on the bedside comm unit, he said, "One moment and I will get Amanda for you. Please hold." He then transferred the call to his study as Amanda would, no doubt, wish to see whom she was talking to. He turned back to his wife. Never since their Terran wedding had anyone called from Earth for her. He walked over to her robe, picked it up and went to wake her. "Amanda," he said as he leaned over her sleeping figure. If it weren't for the important call, he could sit all night and just watch his wife sleep. He enjoyed watching the way the slight bulge of her abdomen moved as she breathed.

 

As she began to stir, he called her name again slightly louder. "Amanda, you have a call from Earth."

 

This time Amanda heard him and opened her eyes. "Sarek? What's going on?"

 

Sarek lifted an eyebrow and allowed his face to soften in a fashion Amanda knew to be a smile. "You have a call from Earth, my wife."

 

With a smile, she awoke fully and looked at her husband. "A call from Earth?"

 

"Yes, Amanda. It awaits you in my study, " Sarek said, handing her her robe and leading her to the adjoining room. Amanda sat at her desk. Sarek stood behind her, his hand resting on her shoulder. His other hand opened the signal from Earth.

 

Amanda looked at the face of her brother. "Matt, it's nice to see you." She smiled as she watched him, memorizing his features. She did not have the opportunity to converse with her family as often as she would have liked.

 

"Mandy, I'm sorry to wake you, I didn't think about the time difference. I assumed you'd be at the Vulcan Science Academy working." He smiled at his baby sister, then his face took a more somber expression. "Mandy, Dad died. He was killed when his flitter hit a wind shear.”

 

Amanda's body went numb. With a deep breath, she fought the tears that wanted to fall. Through her bond with her husband she felt the deep sympathy that he would never vocalize. "When, Matt?"

 

"Three hours ago. The Vulcan Science Academy informed me you were," Matt looked at his sister and the Vulcan that stood behind her, "at home with your husband." He had heard about Sarek from his mother and Marcus. However, not much of it was good. Thankfully, he learned through the years not to take everything Marcus said at face value. When it came to Amanda's happiness, like their dad, he wanted to find out things for himself.

 

"Didn't Mom and Dad get my last communiqué?" Amanda asked, concerned that her brother did not seem to know she was married.

 

"Only part of it. The majority of it was damaged before delivery. We only knew you had married," he told his sister. "There was another part of the transmission that was not quite so clear. I believe you mentioned a baby?"

 

“Yes, Matt. I am almost twenty-eight weeks pregnant," she said as she smiled back at Sarek. "Oh, Matt, where are my manners? This is my husband Sarek."

 

"Ambassador Sarek, if I was told correctly. It is a pleasure to meet you. I hope to see you in person soon," Matthew said.

 

No one had been especially happy Amanda had met and married such a well-known individual. High ranking officials and their families were often easy targets for assassins. The fact that the man she married just so happened to be a Vulcan only added to the fear. Only he and their father openly approved of Amanda's actions.

 

"Indeed. I will bring Amanda to Earth. When is the funeral?" Sarek inquired. He would arrange to take his wife to Earth right away, provided it was deemed safe.

 

Matthew looked at his sister's husband. "Mom chose to leave him in stasis until Amanda came home."

 

"Very well. She will be there as soon as we get the approval of her physician," Sarek told Matthew.

 

"If your doctor thinks it would be unwise to travel, then you must stay on Vulcan. Dad would have hated to bring on the death of a grandchild, especially when this one would be the first," he said as he smiled at his sister. "Well, this call is getting expensive. I hope to see you soon, Mandy, and you, too, Sarek."

 

After the channel closed, Sarek opened a channel to the Vulcan Spaceport. Once someone came on the screen, he stated, "I need my shuttle prepared for a journey to Earth."

 

"When do you wish to depart?" the young Vulcan male asked.

 

Sarek thought about how long it would take to talk to Dr. Corrigan. "Inform Soran to be prepared to leave within 24 hours."

 

"Very well, Ambassador Sarek," the young Vulcan replied.

 

Sarek looked at his wife. "We will leave once it is deemed safe for you to travel such a distance."

 

Neither Sorel nor Dr. Corrigan saw any reason why Amanda could not travel to Earth. Her pregnancy, so far, had been uneventful and was progressing smoothly.

 

~-~

 

 

Sarek and Amanda arrived at her family home in Trenton, New Jersey, slightly before sundown. There was just enough light on the path to show the beauty of the roses that lined the way to the door. Where it had been mid-winter on Vulcan, it was late spring on Earth. The air was filled with the fragrant aroma of the flora. Taking a deep breath, Amanda sighed at the memory of planting the roses. She smiled at her husband. "These are my favorite plants. It's too bad they are so delicate. I would love to take some home."

 

"Yes, Amanda, they do have both a pleasant appearance and aroma," Sarek said as they came to the door. "Perhaps we can find plants that would be suitable on Vulcan."

 

Amanda knocked on the door to her old home before she tried the handle. Finding it unlocked, she opened the door and walked in. Sarek followed closely behind. She called out to her family. "Mom? Matt? Marcus?"

 

A voice came from the back of the house. "Amanda, is that you?"

 

Amanda's smile was bright as she heard her mother's voice. "Mom!"

 

Virginia Grayson stopped in her tracks when she saw her daughter's pregnant state and the tall Vulcan standing next to her. "You must be Ambassador Sarek."

 

"I am," Sarek said to his wife's mother. "However, you may call me Sarek."

 

"Very well, please call me Virginia," she said as she thought about the age difference between her daughter and this Vulcan. She had done some research on him, or at least as much as she was able to. Sarek was ten years older than she was, making him sixty-two Earth years old. She heard, as a Vulcan, he had no emotions. Nevertheless, the thing she heard that troubled her the most was that in his culture, women were made to walk behind their husbands and were treated as second-class citizens.

 

She knew Marcus had dealings with Sarek in the past when Starfleet had transported him to various debates or diplomatic missions. He had described Sarek as cold and unmoving. He had also expressed his anger when he saw Sarek talking to his sister on the Challenger, although Virginia knew he would never let Amanda know that. Now this cold Vulcan was a part of her family, and she knew that to voice her concerns would run the risk of alienating her daughter and grandchild.

 

"Would you like to rest?" she asked as she watched her daughter.

 

Amanda smiled at her mother. "Yes, I am somewhat tired. It was a long trip."

 

"I prepared your old room for you and Sarek," her mother said as she led the way down the hall. She opened the door to reveal a room that obviously belonged to a young woman.

 

Amanda noticed that nothing had been altered. Her pink satin sheets still covered the canopy bed. Even the stuffed animals that sat on her Victorian style chair where still there. Amanda was afraid to open the closet door and have Sarek see the life-size, near naked picture of the model Drew Blake hanging just inside. She had not lived in this room since she was sixteen.

 

Turning to face her mom, she asked, "Can we see dad tonight, or will we have to wait until the morning?"

 

"Amanda, rest tonight. Matthew will take you in the morning," her mom said as she left the room, closing the door behind her.

 

Amanda looked at her husband. "Well, Mr. Ambassador, are you ready for bed?" The very idea of making love to him in her old room seemed to have a sense of risk about it. This thought only seemed to intensify her longing to be with him.

 

Sarek raised an eyebrow at her statement. The only times she called him that was when she wanted to join with him. Reading her desires, he replied, “Amanda, I am not the young school boy that you have in your mind.”

 

"You’re not?" she teased, hoping that would get him to respond. The hormones that ran through her body only drew her desires out more.

 

With a swift movement, he swept her off her feet and carried her to the bed. Although he was not comfortable with joining with her physically out of fear of hurting their child, he was more than willing to join with her mentally. "Amanda, let me show you in the Vulcan fashion what you seem to envision of me."

 

With two fingers extended, he ran them across her jaw and down her neck. His other hand took hold of the clasps on her dress undoing each of them. Removing the dress, he stopped to gaze at her shapely stomach watching with great amazement how it responded as he moved his hand across her abdomen, as if the child within her was seeking him out. His lips curved ever so slightly upwards. His child was responding to his touch.

 

Amanda smiled at the fascination her husband found in her condition. She was always amazed how the growing life inside her would move toward Sarek's hand. She was never quite sure if it was his warm touch that caused the movement or if perhaps her child had the telepathic abilities of Vulcans and could sense Sarek. She ran her fingers through his hair. As much as she desired him, she didn't want to stop his interplay with their child.

 

Sarek looked up from her abdomen and met her eyes. "Our child is quite active."

 

"More so when you touch me," she said as she moved her hand to remove his robe. She had not given up hope to have him make love to her.

 

Sarek returned his attention to fulfilling his wife's desires. Once again, he began to caress her jaw and neck. He reached into her mind and took her to a quiet beach that he had visited once before, on Earth. He raised his eyebrow as her mind dressed him in a human leather jacket, white tee shirt and blue jeans. Together they found the pleasures of joining that now could be found in the privacy of their bond.

 

~-~

 

Sarek awoke at his normal early time. It was his fashion to meditate before Amanda got up. At home, he would simply go out to the garden until she would awaken and join him. Here, however, he was uncertain were he could go and not be disturbed. With a raised eyebrow, he dressed and left the bedroom.

 

"Good morning, Sarek," Virginia said as she looked at her daughter's husband. "Would you care for some coffee or tea?" she asked as she started to get up from the living room couch.

 

"Thank you, but no," Sarek said as he watched the woman that looked so much like his wife. "Is there a place where I may find solitude? It is my usual custom to meditate prior to Amanda's waking."

 

Virginia looked at the strange man her daughter had married. "Meditate?"

 

Sarek knew she didn't understand his ways. "Yes. It is a way Vulcans find their center. Without meditation, we would not function in an acceptable manner."

 

Virginia thought about everything she had been told about Sarek. "There is a gazebo out back. Perhaps afterwards we may have a chance to talk before Amanda awakens."

 

Sarek studied Virginia. He knew she would have questions about him. "That will be acceptable."

 

"Just follow the living room to the kitchen. Go out the back door and you will find the gazebo in the center of the yard. My yard is completely fenced in, which should allow you privacy from the neighbors," she said as she rose to show him the way.

 

~-~

 

Sarek completed his meditation and returned to the house for his discussion with his mother-in-law. He saw her when he walked back to the kitchen as she had been seated at the kitchen table watching him. As long as her questions were not too personal, he would answer them. He looked at Virginia Grayson. "If you are ready to talk, I am prepared to answer your questions." Sarek took the seat at the opposite end of the table, and waited for what was to come.

 

Virginia looked at the tall figure that sat across from her. "Sarek, I believe you are somewhat acquainted with my son, Lt. Cmdr. Marcus Grayson."

 

Sarek did know him; he had the misfortune of getting into a debate with him when Marcus had come to Vulcan to see Amanda before they married. "Yes, I know him. We have already...discussed... the matter of my relationship with Amanda."

 

"I heard about that. Marcus doesn't like you very much. He seems to think that you do not treat Amanda properly," Virginia said.

 

Sarek raised an eyebrow. "I have given her everything I have. Amanda has never, nor will she ever, want for anything."

 

"What about love? Do you love my daughter?" she asked.

 

Sarek was prepared to answer when Amanda's voice came from the doorway. "Mom, the fact that I am carrying his baby is enough to show he cares about me."

 

"Cares about you? I asked if he loves you," the older woman stated coldly.

 

"Mom, leave them be. They haven't come to be interrogated. Amanda is here because dad died," Matthew said as he walked over to his sister. He wrapped her in a hug. "Well, look at you, married and pregnant. Mandy, you know, if you're happy, then I'm happy for you." He looked at Sarek. "Hello, Ambassador. Welcome to our home." He began to reach out his hand but pulled it quickly back, remembering that Vulcans preferred not to be touched.

 

"Why don't you get ready to go, Amanda," Matthew told his sister.

 

Amanda watched her mother and brother. "I'll be ready in fifteen minutes." She could only hope Matt would stop any more badgering from her mother.

 

~-~

 

John Grayson lay peacefully in the stasis chamber. His thick brown hair had just begun to change to gray. There was just enough around the temples to make him look distinguished without looking old. The russet suit he was dressed in accentuated his features, just as in life it would have emphasized his emerald eyes.

 

As Amanda gazed upon her father's face, she wished she could have been there to say good-bye. Her pain from being so far away at the time of his death overwhelmed her. She now understood how her American ancestors must have felt when informed of deaths back in Europe. She was only glad, unlike seven hundred years earlier, her father looked the same now as he did in life. In the past, those loved ones who were lucky enough to be able to afford passage to England, would arrive after the body had been buried. The average citizen would never have had the chance to mourn alongside a grave.

 

The protective beams of the stasis chamber had been dropped, allowing Amanda to touch her father if she so desired. "Oh, Daddy, I'm going to miss you so, " Amanda said as she touched her father's cheek.

 

Matthew placed his hand on her shoulder. "Mandy, Dad knew you loved him. He wanted to come to Vulcan to see you, especially when he read your transmission about being pregnant." He looked at Sarek. "Our father would have never allowed anyone to question your motives toward Mandy. He had too much respect for all life to assume just because you’re not human, you can't be good for my sister."

 

~-~

 

An intimate group of family and friends gathered in the oldest remaining cemetery in the New England area. Mausoleums had been constructed to house those that could afford the costly price of burial instead of cremation.

 

Simplicity laced with tradition of more than a thousand years came together to forge a service befitting a member of a once noble Scottish clan. A dozen white doves were released as a bagpiper played 'Amazing Grace.’

 

The casket was shrouded with a blanket that had an image of the family shield; red with a gold horizontal stripe between three silver fetter locks. Under it was the family motto: Hoc Securior – Safer By This.

 

A placard would cover the door to John Grayson's vault and would read:

John Charles Grayson

July 4th, 2176 – February 16th, 2230

His cup ran over with the milk of human kindness.

 

Nothing could be a more fitting final tribute to a man that took the needs of others above his own.

 

~-~

 

For the first time in her life, Amanda regretted being at a family event. She could feel the stares she and Sarek were receiving. Yet, each time she turned toward them, they were turned away. The few whispers she was able to pick up did nothing to ease her fears that Sarek was the main topic of conversation. Phrases like, "the devil's offspring", "walking computer", and "freezer on feet" were heard by her. Amanda knew if she could hear them, then Sarek, with his acute Vulcan hearing, could hear the entire conversation.

 

Sarek felt his wife's distress at the behavior of her family and attempted to send reassuring thoughts to her. He was not totally unaffected by the bitter words he heard, but the memorial of her father was not the place to allow his anger to surface.

 

It was one matter for strangers to speak in such a manner, however, from one's family, it was something that was not done. While not all of Sarek's family approved of his marriage to Amanda, they would not speak of it, as it was not appropriate to do so. In fact, he knew a great number of his relatives opposed his marriage to her, including his mother.

 

~-~

 

Sarek and Amanda sat on the back porch of her family home watching the stars. Amanda rested her head against her husband's shoulder. Normally Sarek would have only permitted her this in the privacy of their home, however, at this time, Amanda was still greatly affected by the last several days and the attitudes of her family members.

 

When Amanda heard her brothers' voices in the kitchen, she sat up. Sarek heard the conversation, but chose to ignore it. Amanda heard Matt's voice.

 

“Marcus, it is Amanda’s choice. How could you of gotten where you are in Starfleet with that kind of xenophobia?” Matthew asked. From what he had seen of Sarek, he appeared quite nice. Most importantly, he doted over his sister.

 

"He doesn't love her, Matt. Vulcans don't even know what love means."

 

Amanda was shocked that her brother would say such a thing. They rose to enter the house. Once inside, Sarek lifted an eyebrow at the statement Marcus had made. "It is a misconception that Vulcans do not have emotions. We have simply chosen to control them. As for your statement of my being unable to 'love' Amanda, if you mean that I do not treat her with warmth, tenderness, or keep her fondly in my mind, then your statement is incorrect. Amanda wants for nothing as I give her everything I have. I would lay down my life for her and the life of our child. Humans can say the words 'I love you' will such little meaning. Amanda knows my thoughts of her transcend those simple words." 

 

Amanda looked at her brothers. "Marcus, why? It was bad enough to hear what was said at Dad's funeral, but you of all people." The deep hurt showed in her eyes.

 

They both looked at their baby sister. "Mandy, I'm sorry. We were just concerned," Marcus apologized.

 

Matthew smiled at his sister but Amanda would not smile back.

 

"Sarek,” Marcus continued, "it wouldn't really matter who you were. Amanda is our baby sister and I'm afraid it’s just the nature of a big brother to be protective. That and the fact that you’re Vulcan just makes me more protective. I know my sister says she loves you and I'm trying to respect that, however I hope you understand I want what’s best for her." 

 

Amanda walked past her brothers. "Sarek, I want to go home." She was tired of her husband being treated like an outsider by her family. Marcus had never treated any of her other human boyfriends in such a manner.

 

"Marcus, it will be your loss that you will miss being a part of my child's life. If you cannot accept Sarek, then you cannot accept our baby and I want nothing to do with you." Amanda went to their room leaving Sarek behind.

 

Once again, Sarek looked at his wife's brothers.

 

"I am sorry, Sarek,” Matthew said. “Marcus has always had a big mouth."

 

"There is no need to apologize," Sarek said as he watched his wife walk away. The fact she was hurt right now radiated through their bond. He was more concerned for her and their child than for the way her brothers felt. "Perhaps my wife is correct. It is time to go home." Sarek left the kitchen as well.

 

~-~

 

Sarek and Amanda were resting in their cabin when the shuttle made a violent lurch. They were both thrown out of the bed before Amanda made solid contact with the bulkhead.

 

"Ouch!" Amanda cried out as she hit the wall.

 

Sarek regained his footing as he moved to her side. "Amanda, are you injured?"

 

Trying to sit up, she felt a sharp pain in her stomach. "Yes," she said, terribly frightened. They were only a half-day's journey from Vulcan, but if something was wrong, their baby could die. If the protective lining ripped away from her uterus, they both could die.

 

Sarek felt her intense fear and pain wash over their bond. He looked at her as he gently placed his hand over her stomach. "Where does it hurt?" The shuttle made another violent sway and Sarek instantly covered her with his body to stop anything from falling and injuring her further.

 

Once the shuttle settled and Sarek raised his body from hers, Amanda placed his hands where it hurt the most—the area of her left lower abdomen. "Right here. Sarek, I'm frightened."

 

Before Sarek had a chance to reply, Soran's voice came through the comm unit. "Ambassador Sarek, are you injured? We flew into an ion storm."

 

Sarek watched his wife. "I am uninjured,” he replied, "however, my wife has suffered an injury to her abdomen. Contact the Vulcan Science Academy and inform them that she, and possibly the baby, have been injured."

 

"Yes, Ambassador Sarek," Soran replied.

 

Amanda felt a wetness between her legs. "Sarek, I think I might be bleeding," she said with panic in her voice. If she were bleeding, that would mean her baby had a greater chance of death.

 

"Amanda, do you feel the child move?" Sarek knew their child was normally very active.

 

Concentrating on her baby instead of the pain, Amanda felt nothing. "No," she said and began to cry. "Oh, God! Please don't take my baby!"

 

Sarek's heart sank; his normal Vulcan calm all but gone. Now there was enough cause for fear. "Amanda, I must lift you to the bed. I will try not to injure you further." He lifted her gently without jarring her body too much.

 

As he picked her up, she felt a sharp pain move through her abdomen and she cried out.

 

Sarek knew that normally the Vulcan healing trance would be used to stop any bleeding, but Dr. Corrigan had been so insistent that if anything was to happen, he wanted her to feel the pain or any other symptoms. It was hard on Sarek, though. This was his wife and child. He wanted to help them but didn't know what to do. "Amanda, I have to leave you a moment. I will be right back."

 

"Sarek, no. Please don't leave," she cried, grabbing his arm tightly.

 

He did not wish to distress her anymore than she already was so he relented. "Very well, my wife, I will stay. I must call the pilot though," Sarek said as he reached for the comm unit. "Soran, I need to speak with Dr. Corrigan or Sorel. It is an emergency. Tell them my wife is bleeding." He knew Soran could hear the strain in his voice, but right now, he was not concerned with emotional mastery.

 

Soran's voice came through the speaker. "Immediately, Ambassador Sarek."

 

"Amanda, I am going to have to pull up your dress," Sarek said as he looked at her blood-soaked clothes. There was no longer any doubt she was bleeding, but from where? He gently pulled her dress over her hips.

 

Once he saw where the blood was coming from, he closed his eyes. The blood was a mixture of red and green. The light green hint suggested that the liner that had been placed in her uterus had become dislodged. If it severed completely the child would surely die within minutes. For now, the only thing he could do was to make sure Amanda didn't go further into shock. Sarek grabbed a thermoblanket from the foot of the bed and covered her with it. He then pulled out the emergency kit, finding the Tri-ox compound.

 

Amanda felt his fear, something she had never felt from him before. "Sarek, what's wrong?" The hypo he held did nothing to ease her anxiety.

 

Sarek looked at his wife. It would not be logical to hide what he saw from her. "There is a mixture of green in the blood. I am going to give you Tri-ox to get as much oxygen to our baby as I can."

 

Amanda began to cry uncontrollably. "If we would have stayed on Vulcan, our baby would be okay," she sobbed.

 

"Amanda," Sarek began, placing one hand over her abdomen and the other on her psi points, "let me see if I can feel the child's mind. Even an unborn child has thought patterns."

 

Amanda was too upset to speak. She simply nodded her head as he moved his mind into hers. The mind he sought was that of their child. After a few minutes of searching he found it.

 

As if on cue, the baby moved noticeably towards the warmth of Sarek's hand. A smile tugged at his lips. Their child still lived. Fortunately, for now, he need not be as concerned with the lining being torn away completely. Yet he knew they still had to be concerned with Amanda’s blood loss and the pain she was feeling. He pulled the blanket closer around her.

 

Amanda noticed her husband's smile; it had a relaxing affect on her. It was so beautiful and a shame it took the relief of life for him to allow it to adorn his features. She smiled back at him in reply and touched the side of his face with her hand.

 

"Ambassador Sarek, we are to board the U.S.S. Excalibur. They have been advised of T'sai Amanda’s condition and have a medical team standing by," Soran said through the comm, his voice startling both Sarek and Amanda.

 

Sarek looked away from his wife toward the comm unit. "What is our ETA?"

 

"Nineteen point one-five minutes," Soran replied.

 

Sarek looked back at his wife. Hopefully that would not be too long. "Very well, but if we can decrease that time, it would be better," he replied. He was torn between his own thoughts and following the advice of Dr. Corrigan. He could use the Vulcan healing trance to at least control, if not completely stop, the bleeding. He conveyed this to his wife across the bond.

 

Amanda looked at her husband's features; worry and concern were still very prominent. Yet, she could feel his love for their unborn child. She knew she would be unable to handle this child's death, but now she was concerned with how Sarek, even with his discipline, would handle it. "If you think it would help to go against Dr. Corrigan's advice, then we will."

 

Sarek looked at his wife with a raised eyebrow. He placed his hands over her face to initiate the healing trance. Slowly he felt her slip into the light sleep that the trance required. Once he felt her mind using the methods even humans possessed to control pain and heal the body, he withdrew from her.

 

~-~

 

When Amanda awoke, she was in the Vulcan Science Academy Hospital, her abdomen still the shape of a ball. "Sarek?" she called out as she looked around. Tubes disappeared into her arm. They seemed to be removing her blood.

 

"You have awakened," Sarek's voice came from the direction she had not looked yet. He moved to her bed and reached down to her face, caressing her cheek.

 

The touch sent chills through her body, but she had too many questions to allow his touch to affect her. "Why am I hooked up to this?" she asked as she met his eyes.

 

"It was explained to me that the accident caused the lining in your uterus to partially tear away. Fortunately, it tore on the opposite wall of the placenta. When it tore away some of our…" the doctor on the Excalibur had unknowingly mentioned the sex of the baby, yet he vowed to himself no matter how pleased he was their first child was a son, he would keep it from Amanda as she would want to be surprised, "...child's blood leaked into your system,” he said. "The increased copper had already begun to damage your liver. To lessen the damage they are now cleansing your blood." He depressed the call button that would indicate to the doctor that Amanda had awoken.

 

"Our baby is all right then?" Amanda asked.

 

Sarek nodded. "Our child lives."

 

"Well, if that isn't a nice sight," Dr. Corrigan said as he walked in the room. He smiled at Amanda. "You know, Amanda, you had the doctor on the Excalibur worried for a while. He had never worked on a hybrid pregnancy before." He looked at Sarek. "If it weren't for the healing trance, you and the child might have both died."

 

Amanda smiled. "Will we be okay?" she asked.

 

"I believe they were able to remove enough of the copper right away to stop permanent damage to your liver,” the doctor said. “However, you will be spending the remainder of your pregnancy here. Vulcan pregnancy is normally fifty-six weeks, but your body will not be able to handle the strain much longer,” he said. "You're now thirty-two weeks. If your liver does not respond well to treatment, we will have no choice but to do a c-section. It is our hope to hold off delivering the child for at least four weeks. If the child were fully human, it would not be a problem to deliver a baby this early. But since your child's Vulcan genes are dominant, it will be important to keep it in your body as long as possible. That way it will have a better chance for survival. Even if we are able to sustain your pregnancy for the four weeks, the child will still need a great deal of medical care," Dr. Corrigan explained.

 

"If my body does not respond, then will our baby have to be in an incubator?" Amanda asked. She remembered how small babies had been put in incubators and hooked up to all sorts of horrid looking equipment.

 

"Yes, however, we have already begun to administer medication that will aid in the development of the baby’s internal organs." He moved to the monitors. "Your copper levels are at 4 mg. When you got here last night they were almost 7 mgs. I would like to see them at 2 mg as a human needs that much.

 

Amanda yawned. "Why am I still so tired?"

 

Dr. Corrigan looked back to her. “Liver problems are known to cause fatigue." He then looked at Sarek. "I also understand the healing trance takes a lot of energy."

 

Sarek nodded and turned to his wife. "Perhaps it would be wise to rest," he told her gently.

 

Dr. Corrigan nodded in agreement. "Yes, that's a good idea. I’ll check on you again before I leave, Amanda,” he said.

 

Amanda smiled again. "Okay." She looked at Sarek. "Sarek, please go home and rest. I am willing to bet you haven't slept since this whole ordeal began."

 

Sarek turned to his wife. "I do not wish to leave you," he said. “I will, however, rest in the chair." He had been able to rest somewhat comfortably in the chair while he sat waiting for her to awaken. He leaned down and quickly kissed her lips. "Now rest, Amanda."

 

After her husband returned to the chair, she closed her eyes.

 

~-~

 

At thirty-nine weeks, it was decided Amanda's body could no longer handle the stress of the baby she carried. Gestational diabetes and toxemia set in at thirty-six weeks, and after repeated efforts to counter both, they made the problems with her liver worse. By the early part of her thirty-ninth week, she developed jaundice, a further indication of her liver damage.

 

Amanda was weak and there was concern she would not be able to handle delivering the baby by natural means. However, she was desperate to try. Dr. Corrigan agreed to allow her to attempt natural childbirth with the understanding that if at any point her or the baby's health was at risk, he would immediately deliver the baby by c-section.

 

To speed the process of labor, Amanda was given Pitocin and the cervical plug was removed. Within twenty minutes, she felt the onset of true contractions. Her entire uterus felt as though it was being ripped out of her body. Her back hurt so much, she couldn't stand to lay flat. It seemed to help when she walked around, allowing the force of gravity to aid in the baby's descent. She had been offered pain blockers but wanted to feel the mixture of pain and pleasure childbirth had to offer.

 

When her labor progressed to a point where the contractions overwhelmed her, Sarek wasn't sure how to interpret her reactions to them. During the most powerful contractions, Amanda blamed him for her pain. Then, just as soon as the contractions subsided, she told him how much she loved him. He knew they were intense as he could feel them through their bond as well as through the physical contact with her hand. At one point, his hand went numb from the pressure she exerted on it.

 

After five hours of labor, a cap of black hair began to emerge. "Amanda, a few more pushes and your baby will be a part of this world," Dr. Corrigan told her.

 

Although she was tired and weak, Amanda wanted her baby out. With a worn breath, she asked, "Is it almost over?" She wanted to see the face of the little creature that caused her such pain and joy at the same time. Another contraction hit and she felt the head slip farther out of her body.

 

Sarek watched as the last contraction pushed his son out. He was quite captivated how fine looking their child was, despite the fact that he was covered in blood and a white cheesy substance. He felt an overwhelming joy that he now had a son, his first child. It wasn't hard to reason that when it would come to his family, his Vulcan logic would be of little use. "So human," he softly whispered at the same time the infant's lungs filled with their first breath of air and exhaled in the form of a cry. It wasn't something he meant against the nature of his son, but more the feeling his wife would describe as human-pride.

 

Amanda looked at Sarek sharply. "What did you just say?" She hoped she heard him wrong because to her, it sounded as though he was displeased with their son.

 

Sarek blinked at the realization that not only had he spoken the words aloud, but that his wife had misinterpreted them. He had two choices; either let his wife think he was displeased by his son, or betray his upbringing and admit to the sense of pride he felt. He straightened and told his wife through their bond that it was merely a comment on the way he felt. It was the only way he could be truthful to her without betraying his heritage further.

 

Sarek moved away from his wife to get a better look at his tiny son and spoke to him in Vulcan. "Thee will be known as Spock." He watched as a nurse placed his small son in the incubator, which would be his home for at least the next four months. Then he saw a second healer place a breathing tube down the tiny throat as the infant was having difficulty breathing. “May his mother view him before he leaves?” Sarek asked, ignoring the raised eyebrow of the Vulcan nurse.

 

Dr. Corrigan smiled toward Amanda. "Briefly,“ he said. “We need to stabilize him, and we don’t want to run the risk of his becoming ill due to a weaken immune system."

 

The nurse brought the unit closer to Amanda. With Sarek’s help, she was able to rise high enough to see inside the incubator. From the beginning, she had been prepared for this moment, but imagining it and seeing it were two different things. Amanda watched as his chest sharply rose and fell with each breath. His skin looked almost translucent; small greenish-blue veins showed beneath it. She closed her eyes a moment, silently asking God to spare his life.

 

When she once again opened her eyes, she smiled. He was a fighter, her son; he could have died during the shuttle accident. "Well, hello there, little one," Amanda said in a soft voice as she viewed the rest of her newborn son. She looked at his tiny head--his ears pointed at the tips; his little eyes topped with eyebrows slightly turned up. However, most of what she looked for was assurance his body had formed correctly. With a smile, she looked at her husband. "He's perfect."

 

Sarek nodded, for he, too, found his son to be perfect. "He is quite pleasing."

 

Dr. Corrigan moved to Amanda. "I'm afraid time's up,” he said. He looked at the nurse. "You may take him now."

 

Amanda reluctantly watched as they left the room. "Doctor, will I be able to nurse him?"

 

"Until he is stable, he will have to receive his nourishment through a feeding tube.” Seeing the hurt look on Amanda’s face, he added. “However, once he is tested and we know how to best supplement his needs, you may express yourself to feed him. Expressing your milk will also allow you to nurse him, once he is able." He left the room to allow Sarek and Amanda a moment of privacy.

 

Once they were alone, Sarek looked at his wife. "I am greatly pleased with our son and with your strength," he said, offering her two fingers. Once they were home and she was fully healed, he intended to show her just how pleased he was.

 

 

The End


End file.
